As you have probably seen, the first 50 Shades of Grey trailer came out today. It’s time for a confession:
I have never read 50 Shades of Grey.
I know you assumed every female between the ages of 18 and 65 had delved between the covers of this ‘worldwide phenomenon’ but I, like a magical unicorn, am a rare creature who has not. I have considered it. I wanted to know what all of the hype was about. But there was always something else to read. It didn’t help that I knew its origins as a Twilight fanfic. If I wanted to read smutty fan fiction I’d at least do so with characters I actually like. I can’t help but be turned off by a protagonist that is based on Bella.
However now there is going to be a movie and I am backed into a corner of the proverbial movie vs book argument. I usually stand with a firm “book first” policy; the book is always better than the movie. So does that mean I have to read it?
“Not necessarily,” you say logically. “You could just not see the movie, then there would be no need to read the book.” Perfectly reasonable suggestion reader. I like the way you think. But alas there is a flaw in your cunning plan and his name is Jamie Dornan. I worship the ground he walks on because he appears to be a god descended from heaven to grace us with his hunky manly beard scruff. I must see him, therefor I must see this film.
So to prepare myself & to psych myself up for reading the book I decided to check out the trailer. Here is my stream-of-consciousness reaction to what I saw:
0:12 – This music is both lulling me into a dulled state and drawing me into the ‘action’…how effective.
0:18 – Doesn’t she have anyone in her life to point out that her sweater & skirt are too matchy-matchy without actually matching? Most protagonists have a plucky sidekick or style-conscious roommate…perhaps I’d know if I’d have read the books…
0:29 – Why are they blurring his perfect face?!?!? Obviously for the sense of mystery, but he is the main reason I care about this film. I still lament to anyone will listen that they killed Graham on Once Upon a Time (2 seasons ago).
0:43 – I agree girl…I don’t want to know more about you. Just show me the sexy man.
0:46 – Hello Gorgeous.
0:52 – Are things going to get saucy now?
1:05 – There it is ?
1:11 – That helicopter probably wont blow up at any point of the film, eh? Too bad; I tend to prefer movies where helicopters blow up over films released on Valentines Day.
1:19 – It physically hurts to look at him. He is sooooo good looking.
1:20 – That hood is ominous and yet I really want that hoody. The amount in which a hood engulfs my head is the number one factory I use to judge hooded sweater & jackets.
1:30 – I can’t even…I just can’t…
1:36 – That looks fun.
1:38 – That also looks fun ?
1:43 – “Enlighten me then…”
1:48 – What’s behind door number one?
1:52 – This is getting into what I actually know about this book.
2:00 – What is that noise….???
Watch the trailer for yourself here and let me know in the comments what you think:
Love & Luck,